The Best Of

by Thrash Commander

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about

I'm an umbrella

credits

released November 29, 2014

All music by Eric Lamb (Magoo)
Brandon Adame - Vocals on Thrash Commander
Sean Murray - Programmed solo on Drunk on Metal, played drums on BEARS!
Gaston Ramirez - Backup vocals on Drunk on Metal and WHAT!?, vocals on Driving Drunk and Way Too Fast
Guy Dolev - Recorded The Descent, Barnacle Holocaust, Drink Till You Die, and Night Forest Jam, guitar solos on The Descent, Drink Till You Die, Buttrock City, Barnacle Holocaust, and Driving Drunk and Way Too Fast, wrote the outro for Barnacle Holocaust
Tom Hoopes - Drums and bass on Moonlit Masquerade
Michael Ryan - Recorded Moonlit Masquerade, also did the bass
Josh McDonough - Guitar solo on WHAT!?
Josh Nordholm and Mike my neighbor - Backing vox on Dem Riffs
Phil Porras - Did the mixing on I'm Dreamin of a Black Xmas
Connor Pixley - Interrupted me while I was Jackin Off in the Shower

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about

Thrash Commander Goleta, California

Eric Lamb "Errock Magoo" is a local musician in the Goleta/Santa Barbara metal scene and sometimes talks in 3rd person. He's been in several bands and solo projects, Thrash Commander is the unification of several different projects under one name. Projects include: Full Metal Face Melt, Hellfunk, Hellforest, Unholy Cult of Headbanging Ghosts, Mens Aer, and Errock Magoo. ... more

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Track Name: Thrash Commander
Just who the hell am I? They call me Mr. Magoo. Well I'm the god damn Thrash Commander. Nice to meet you.

Walking tall at 5 foot 4, this small dude is master of riffs
Through his songs you'll hear the fury, Thrash Commander every day

Let the madness become music
Let them hear you shred
Shred forever

BURN! Let them feel your rage!
Thrash Commander! SHRED FOREVER!
Track Name: Drunk on Metal
You bang your head you thrash about you throw the horns rock the fuck out you push you shove you don't take shit you'd give your life before you quit

Drunk on metal, you're the man it's your turn now so fuck shit up
Drunk on metal, show these fucking posers how it's done

Bang your head until your neck snaps off
Drunk on metal, no it's never enough
Rock the fuck out until your life is through
Show these kids what real metal heads do
Track Name: The Descent
Falling off the edge you begin the descent
terror in your eyes because soon you'll be dead

Falling faster and deeper within
Now your mind fills with regret
Free falling down through a fiery volcano
Now you begin the descent
Into hell
Track Name: Barnacle Holocaust
Look here they come one by one just to barn you
Run away, get away, get the hell out of this place
It's too late, you've been trapped in the barn trap
You've been barned, You've been barned, and there's nothing you can do

Try to run, try to hide, there is nothing you can do to escape the barn

(extra verse not in the recording)
Look there they are everywhere and they're here to stay
Now you're fucked, Now you're fucked, now you're really out of luck
It's your own private hell in your own home
You've been barned, You've been barned, and it's totally your fault

There is no light of hope for you
Barnacle Holocaust
Track Name: Driving Drunk and Way Too Fast
Driving drunk and way too fast
Move aside I'm haulin ass
Get the hell out of my way
I'm trying to end my life today

(chorus)
Time it's not slowing down it's going faster
The laws of physics be damned
Tank full of gas cops on my ass
And I'm going as fast as I can

Highway twists and turns
I'm drifting around the curves
Roadblock in my way
Ain't gonna stop me today

(chorus)
(solo land)

Got an engine that just won't quit
I'm pushing the car to the limits
I barely make the turn
Sooner or later I'mma crash and burn

(chorus, but ending a little differently)
Time it's not slowing down it's going faster
The laws of physics be damned
Tank full of gas, cops on my ass
Too drunk to give a damn

My time has come I feel it
The devil is riding with me
I won't live to see tomorrow
I smile as I crash and die
Track Name: Drink Til You Die
Today... Man what the fuck?
Grab a beer, lets get drunk
Lets drink beer until we're dead
Tonight we'll get fucked up, fucked up in the head

Drink till your corpses rot
Mental decay
Takes over everything
Life fades away

(chorus)
Grab a beer, pound it dry, life is shit, drink till you die
Fuck the world, and fuck you too, just give me a beer all I want is a beer

If life's got you down, and you're all out of luck
Just grab a beer, and don't give a fuck
Cause no one will judge you when you're wasted
You know that's the best beer that you've ever tasted

(chorus)
Grab a beer, pound it dry, life is shit, drink till you die
Fuck the world, and fuck you too, just give me a beer
all I want is a fucking beer!
Track Name: Jackin Off In The Shower
Jackin off, Jackin off in the shower
Jackin off deep into the night
Conditioner lubing my erection
Oh yeah! I'm feelin good tonight

(chorus)
Jackin off
Jackin off
Jackin off
In the shooooweeer (squirt squirt squirt)
(repeat)

Steamy waterfall of pleasure
Thinkin about all the pretty girls
Someone comes knocking at my door
He said

Connor: "Hey, can you stop jacking off in the shower?
You're using up all the hot water and I don't wanna step in your jizz"

(chorus)
Track Name: WHAT!?
Smokin weed and drinkin beer
Has never made my thoughts so clear
I can rock all day and night
When the feelin is right

I got this feelin inside like nothin can stop me
ain't no one gonna hold me back
Gonna rock this town from dusk till dawn
so shred motherfucker it's on
I got an old guitar that just won't quit
and I'm really grinding those frets to the limit
Using an amp, but it ain't mine
but you know my riffs are so divine

(chorus)
WHAT etc.

I got nothin left to say
Stealing Megadeth riffs is gay
Anyone can write this shit
But it'll still be a hit
(oh yeah you know it)

Gonna get on down like no tomorrow
baby gonna rock your socks
Gonna shred this strings until they break
and then I'm gonna drink some beer
Gonna smoke that ganj until it's gone
and my brain is dripping on the floor
Gonna rock my tunes until I'm dead
shredding til forevermore

(chorus)
Track Name: Dem Riffs
You've got a thirst for black death and thrash
We've got your fix... DEM RIFFS
You'll taste the hell that we've endured
So check this out... DEM RIFFS

If you got no chops I feel bad for you son, I got 99 problems but a
RIFF AIN'T ONE
If you're looking for more Satan, boy, I'll tell you where to go
Get down to Santa Barbara to our metal show

You've got a thirst for black death and thrash
We've got your fix... DEM RIFFS
You'll taste the hell that we've endured
So check this out... DEM RIFFS
You've got a need for black death and thrash
So get on down... DEM RIFFS
You'll bang your head, rock the fuck out,
You can't deny... IT'S DEM RIFFS
Track Name: Moonlit Masquerade
As the sun fades past the horizon
The restless dead rise from the ground
The ancient evil spirits of old
Awaken to begin their rounds
From the forest the army of dead
Moves towards the human race
To rip their souls from their flesh
To take upon their face

(chorus)
Into the night the demos ride
A masquerade of human flesh
A sacrifice of souls
To take away what should be ours
Your right to life
It's the moonlit masquerade

Now... Now the time has come
For you and your kind
To feel what we have felt
Trapped inside that hell
Rotting for our mistakes
That we made so long ago
Waiting for the day
We would rise to see you die

Ceremony goes as planned
Satan's summoned to this land
To take away their wretched souls
To give us all strength!
Corpse army of the damned
Ready too stand and fight
But for now we must retreat
As the sun begins to give light

(chorus)
Track Name: Unholy Cult of Headbanging Ghosts
If you should wander into these lands
You will not find us for we are dead
Unholy music fills the air
Carried by the nightwinds

Bang your head for the dead
The Unholy Cult of Headbanging Ghosts

In the night the dead will ride
The Unholy Cult of Headbanging Ghosts
Track Name: Night Forest Jam
Deep in the black of night
Demon hordes of ghoulish fright
Gather in Forgotten Woods
Waiting for the night forest jam

Night Forest Jam

Damned sons from times of old
Gather here in winter cold
To this forest realm
Black metal band from hell jams

Night Forest Jam

Now the jam is done
Daylight's just begun
None tell but none forget
Of the great night forest jam

(or, if at the night forest jam)

Jam is never done
Madness has just begun
You will never forget
Of this night forest jam

Night Forest Jam
Track Name: I'm Dreamin of a Black Xmas
Another hot summer day
I wish the sun would go away
I haven't seen a cloud in days
I'm melting from the solar rays

(chorus)
I'm dreamin of a black christmas
A day of snow and fog and rain
Won't someone take away the sunshine
No more sunshine, no more

I can't stand this heat anymore
I can't enjoy the outdoors
I'm calling for the winds of old
I'm longing for the winter cold

(chorus)
Track Name: Buttrock City
Stars drown in the morning sky and it seems like buttrock is starting to die
Dreams are fading away like my makeup, but I'm gonna make the world get down tonight

(chorus)
I know where I'm going
I'm going to buttrock city
Where all the drugs are stronger
And all the girls are pretty
I'd love to take you with me
But I don't wanna bring you down
Get down tonight

Walkin down sunset blvd, seeing my life go flashing by
Suddenly some glam caught my eye
She took me by the hand and said come with me

(chorus)

Pack your bags, we're going to buttrock city
GET DOWN TONIGHT!

(chorus)
Track Name: BEARS!
BEARS! BEARS! BEARS!
All around me
BEARS! BEARS! BEARS!
They surround me
(repeat)

(chorus)
Why are the bears stalking me?
Why can't they just leave me be?
Do you know why? it's because they're bears.

Why won't the bears go away I simply don't want them to stay but I don't think they really care but that's because they're bears.

(repeat first verse)
(chorus)
Track Name: Dallas Dalton and the Outer Space Adventure
I keep clippers in my pockets
So I can trim up all the leaves
I keep clippers in my pockets
So I can trim up all the leaves
I see an unkempt bush somewhere
And I just can't leave it be
Track Name: Drunken Musical Adventure
I'm drunk and I'm rockin alone
Ain't nobody here to hear my jams
I've got an itchin to shred
and I can't hold back anymore
I can't let it be
The need to break free
If only you could see

I'm drunk, you're drunk, she's drunk
Everybody's drunk, so lets have a party
with shred and booze and weed and friends and awesomeness
I just wanna shred for you
I wanna shred for all of you all night long
All night long, until the break of dawn

I don't want the jams to end
but your journey has only just begun
you need to drink more beer and have more fun

How could this be? I thought I had another beer
What should I do? It's too late to go to the store
The more I think the more sober I become
Should I sleep or keep on writing this song?

Holy shit, I just found another beer!
Fucking awesome! I guess I'll keep writing this song

Finish your beer, it's time to say goodbye
Your journey is over now
Thank you for listening
And goodbye